One Flesh: A New Family Unit

“And they become one flesh.” When a man leaves his parents and clings to his wife in marriage, the two of them become one flesh.

Meaning just what? Robert Alter translates, “they become one flesh. And the two of them were naked and unashamed.” So, which is correct? Are they one or are they two? Or, can they be both one and two? What did Moses mean by “one flesh?”

Does it merely mean that they are now in sexual union? Adam recognized in Eve that she was in substance the same as he when he said: “This one at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” Gen 2:23. See the connection? Flesh…my flesh.

When Judah saw that his brothers were considering killing Joseph their younger brother, he remonstrated with them and said: “Come. Let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hand on him; after all, he is our brother, our own FLESH and blood.” Genesis 37:27 It is also used to describe the kin relationship between Jacob and Laban (Gen 29:14), David and his nephew Amasa (2 Sam. 19:13) and a closest relative (2 Sam. 5:1).

So, the expression “one flesh” describes a family unit and kinship. From the parents being the closest relative, through marriage the wife becomes the closest relative. The wife now occupies the closest link to him and the most binding relationship. Husband-wife relationships supersede parent-child relationships. Marriage is now trump. So, they remain two individual people with their own identities, but together in marriage, they constitute one new family.